Your Most Embarrassing Poolroom Experience?

[sunnyone]

Dear Gentle Readers,

This is an invitation to bare -- well, if not your soul -- at least your embarrassment! Bare your embarrassment, hey, I kind of like that!

Okay, I’ll kick things off!

Back when I had a pretty acceptable boyfriend, back when I was pretty much full of myself, I contracted with a pool instructor to try to learn some of the basics. (Such as how to draw the cue ball. Hey, not everyone is born with insider info!)

He fired me.

During my first lesson.

My felony? Yapping away with my girlfriends; not paying much attention to the professional I was paying to tutor me.

He was right, I was wrong. My fault.

(Was this the lowest-of-low points in my life?

(Ho! Hardly.

(One minor example? In middle school Muffy and I were both ‘deeply, profoundly in love’ with the same, quite sophisticated older man … he was probably around 14. We let him talk us into making out with each other. My mom, calm as customary, suggested we agree to continue visually pleasing him just as soon as he started snuggling up with his own best friend.

(End of that stroll down that particular lane.)

Point?

Most of us can avert our memory-eyes -- okay, sometimes with some considerable relief! -- from past missteps.

But somehow an incident -- even my own demeaning billiards tutorial encounter -- seems easier to fade if it occurs inside a poolroom. At least it appears to be that way for me.

Not sure why.

Maybe it’s that ongoing, almost subliminal, thrum ... that sense of a competitive, and creative, undercurrent that permeates some rooms.

Maybe it’s that vague, ambient awareness that almost every ignominious episode that could have happened has, in fact, already happened. Sometime. In some pool hall, somewhere. To someone.

Or ... maybe I’m smoking dope!

So … give it up ... your own pool emporia humiliations … fess up, boys … don’t be shy!

Endorsing self-mortification is my life,

Sunny




Sent from my iPhone6 (Beta).

 

[piggybank04]

how come you keep calling us gentle readers?? we are pool players.......basically cave men with cue sticks......

 

[androd]

Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
Rod.

 

[bstroud]

Losing!

Bill S.

 

[petie]

I don't know whether to call it embarrassing or not but is uncomfortable and it has happened several times to me. I've many times helped a younger player with their game when they needed it. Well, one day you're showing this kid how to play pool and it seems like the next day he is woofin' on you. I hate it.

 

[WhatWouldWojoDo]

Embarassing

Embarassing

Mike Massey came to do an exhibition and it happened on a league night. I signed up to play him a challenge match but when they called my name I was in an APA Masters match so they skipped me. When my matched finished I went over and they just finished the last challenge match. The APA league rep convinced Mike to play me. Mike says OK but lets make it quick. Instead of running all the way to the other end of the pool hall to get my break cue I used my brand new Predator Sneaky Pete (less than a week old) to break with. I broke 75% power and was probably 19 or 20 mph but what happened shocked me...

The shaft broke, slid through my hand and cut me. The shaft bounced off the table and landed on the floor. Immediately Mike walked over and asked what kind of cue it was. I told him Predator and his response was "I've never seen that happen to a predator". The wood separated completely from the joint. 75-100 people watching and i know practically all of them. Some thought it was a Gag/joke but I didn't know what to feel - embarassed, confused, and even frustrated that my new cue broke. I went and grabbed my cheap Players cue and beat Mike. After the match he told me that Predator will honor their warranty and if they don't I can tell them Mike would back me up that it happened in an exhibition with him. Then he added "just don't tell them that you beat me or they won't believe you." lol

 

[RedCard]

Lucky Strike

Lucky Strike

I had just returned to the bar to resume a 9 ball game after taking an earned and scheduled recess outside. I do not know what the 5 cigarettes were doing in my shirt pocket instead of my sock where they belonged. I had apparently put them there before I came back into the bar to give a couple to the barmaid and some friends. Anyway...I broke, (a massive, thunderous, one-ball shattering break) and the recently-rolled-5 shot out of my shirt pocket onto the table. It was only mildly embarrassing, and considering the joint I was in, an appropriate display. I think I actually made a couple of new friends over that. The rail lit up like they had finally won something.

 

[Cowboy Dennis]

Dear Gentle Readers,

This is an invitation to bare -- well, if not your soul -- at least your embarrassment! Bare your embarrassment, hey, I kind of like that!

Sunny

My embarrassing moment came as I attempted to break a leg. I'll explain; I had thy vixen bent-over the table as she begged cap bung. Aye, she was bugaroch so I removed her crabshells. I could see in her glims the gill was fly, but I was agog like the heavers. I hardly had to lick the wench before her whistler was down upon it. I grabbed her Fanny Blair and gave her the velvet. I say, I love these trapes who give-up the gutter-lane. I did away with her vampers, her hams, and clutched her trotters. I must say; the moll was bleak. Aye, she was a high-flyer and made me wobble, and she nearly put me in Job's Dock though I begged for the libbege.

Then we heard the room-owner's key opening the door and I got her off the bartable quickly, then we dressed just as quickly.

Dennis

 

[fred bentivegna]

My embarrassing moment came as I attempted to break a leg. I'll explain; I had thy vixen bent-over the table as she begged cap bung. Aye, she was bugaroch so I removed her crabshells. I could see in her glims the gill was fly, but I was agog like the heavers. I hardly had to lick the wench before her whistler was down upon it. I grabbed her Fanny Blair and gave her the velvet. I say, I love these trapes who give-up the gutter-lane. I did away with her vampers, her hams, and clutched her trotters. I must say; the moll was bleak. Aye, she was a high-flyer and made me wobble, and she nearly put me in Job's Dock though I begged for the libbege.

Then we heard the room-owner's key opening the door and I got her off the bartable quickly, then we dressed just as quickly.

Dennis

STop, Stop, please Dennis. At least let the yeggs know where you are coming from.:lol

Freddy B

 

[petie]

My embarrassing moment came as I attempted to break a leg. I'll explain; I had thy vixen bent-over the table as she begged cap bung. Aye, she was bugaroch so I removed her crabshells. I could see in her glims the gill was fly, but I was agog like the heavers. I hardly had to lick the wench before her whistler was down upon it. I grabbed her Fanny Blair and gave her the velvet. I say, I love these trapes who give-up the gutter-lane. I did away with her vampers, her hams, and clutched her trotters. I must say; the moll was bleak. Aye, she was a high-flyer and made me wobble, and she nearly put me in Job's Dock though I begged for the libbege.

Then we heard the room-owner's key opening the door and I got her off the bartable quickly, then we dressed just as quickly.

Dennis

Too rich, much too rich.

 

[Tom Wirth]

Well I'm not sure I would call this an embarrassing moment but it was certainly eye popping and called for my undivided attention. I was working in an upscale pool room where a lot of good players played but also where families were coming for lunch and dinner because this room had a great chef who was preparing extensive menus. On this particular evening I was managing the room and running a weekly $20.00 entry fee nine ball tournament with about 25 entries.

One guy brought his girl friend and entered her in the event. She was really cute and dressed in a short skirt so all the guys were happy to see she had signed up to play. It didn't take long though before we all realized that this girl had come to the event and forgotten her drawers. She bent over to take her first shot and that's when we all got a really good shot.

The following week attendance for the tournament skyrocketed but the number of families bringing their kids for dinner dropped off dramatically!

Tom

PS The last part of this story isn't quite right but it sounds better than the truth. I had to make her go to her car and find her panties. Such is the life of a manager. :sorry

 

[piggybank04]

My embarrassing moment came as I attempted to break a leg. I'll explain; I had thy vixen bent-over the table as she begged cap bung. Aye, she was bugaroch so I removed her crabshells. I could see in her glims the gill was fly, but I was agog like the heavers. I hardly had to lick the wench before her whistler was down upon it. I grabbed her Fanny Blair and gave her the velvet. I say, I love these trapes who give-up the gutter-lane. I did away with her vampers, her hams, and clutched her trotters. I must say; the moll was bleak. Aye, she was a high-flyer and made me wobble, and she nearly put me in Job's Dock though I begged for the libbege.

Then we heard the room-owner's key opening the door and I got her off the bartable quickly, then we dressed just as quickly.

Dennis

your sexual fantasies dont count as embarrassing moments, but i'll give you credit for a vivid imagination.....lol.....maybe you could put that to use in one pcket sometime.......

 

[Cowboy Dennis]

your sexual fantasies dont count as embarrassing moments, but i'll give you credit for a vivid imagination.....lol.....maybe you could put that to use in one pcket sometime.......

PB,

Things that actually happened are not fantasies. No imagination was required..

RBL