Clare, I can't agree with that. Sending money in these circumstances is not the same as sending flowers or a casserole. It carries at least the implication that the guy must have died destitute, or close to it, and I feel certain that many proud people would take offense, and rightly so. It is certainly not rude if they decline such offers. At least wait until they ask.
Vapros, we will just have to agree to disagree. Money is a kind gesture just like any other kind gesture. It does not implicate that the guy was destitute or close to it. Does giving a casserole mean that the receivers are starving? I have had two immediate family members pass away and money, as well as other offerings, were given. Neither decedent was destitute, in fact far from it. The money was accepted as graciously as the other gifts. In one case, the money was used to purchase new books for a local library and in the other case, a scholarship was initiated. Recently, my good friend's father retired. I understand that a retirement is not the same as a death. Her father was an established doctor. Some of his patients gave him money when he retired. One patient gave him a card with $20 in it. He was not insulted or offended. He graciously accepted it and thanked them.
Below is a quote that Grady made on Facebook on Feb.8. Evidently, Grady was not insulted by monetary offerings. I have copied and pasted:
I had a list on my computer desk of all the people who generously sent me flowers, money, letters and cards. I spilled coffee on it and couldn’t read any of them. A belated thanks to everyone of them, as I did struggle some in my fight against cancer and needed every bit of that assistance.
I live on $300 a week my business pays me and my SS check of $321.I’ve learned to live economically because of having been a single father for many years. I love you all and again, doctor gives me 2 to 5 years with a possibility of more.I look forward to going to the Memphis event in June.I have pictures coming from the DCC and the HOF.